White Knuckles: Another Happy Birthday

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By Brendan O'Hallarn Wednesday, December 28, 2011

To my daughter, on her sixth birthday today:

It was a wonderful Christmas, but do you know what my very favorite part was? It was when I opened the picture you gave me, where you were sitting on the beach and had written “Love You Daddy” in the sand. It made me cry.

Someday, when you’re older, and Daddy is much older, I’m going to take out that picture and look at it, and hold you close, marveling at how you’ve grown up before our eyes. Because the past six years, from the morning you arrived, through the day your brother was born, have been the best time of my life.

It’s your birthday today, your special day. You’ll want to ride the bicycle Santa brought you, and probably play with the new toys you receive for your big day. But I need to write a few things to you today, because you’ll never be this age again.

I remember the night you were born. We were in a hospital room in Winnipeg, and I held you in my arms and cried and cried, then looked out the window and saw the most beautiful giant snowflakes falling, illuminated by the morning light.

Each milestone you hit is a vivid memory for me. Your first word (“duck”). Your first solid food. But I especially remember the first time you walked.

We were moving from Winnipeg to Virginia and were selling a bunch of things at a garage sale. A family with a little girl showed up on our front lawn. We looked over and you were holding your new friend by a single finger, walking together down our front sidewalk. Magic.

You’ve always been so sociable. I love how, even today, if you see a child even remotely close to your age, you’ll sprint over and introduce yourself, asking to play or chat or offering to share. And I love how, if you don’t know your new playmate’s name, you’ll address them as “friend.”

I realize you found out when your brother arrived three years ago that sharing space with a sibling isn’t always easy. But we’re so proud of how you protect your brother, how you include him in your games, and even how you conspire with him to get into trouble. I loved seeing you lift him up to the counter last week, to get the treats you couldn’t quite reach yourself. You’re a team!

You don’t always do what we tell you, but do you know what? That’s a good thing! We want you to assert your independence. And I know, it’s hard to be the oldest. You must feel sometimes that mom and dad are always mad at you. Know this … there’s never a second of any day where we aren’t proud of you.

You’re at school now, and you’re learning so much. I love how you come home with a backpack full of artwork every day, and want to show us each and every piece. And they’re beautiful, just like you. At your recent Christmas concert, you were sitting like a good girl, waiting for your turn to sing, and you looked over and caught mommy’s eye, then waved excitedly. Just know how special that was to mommy. It made her cry, overwhelmed with the joy of the moment.

You’re growing up now, sprouting out of all of your clothes (tall like daddy!) and talking more like the big girl you are every day. And though we’d love to stop time, and keep you this age forever, we know you’ve got a great big world to explore. We can’t wait to hear all about it from you, because we know you’ll love to tell us.

Happy birthday!

White Knuckles is a column about life as a busy dad with two very busy kids. If you have a story you want to share, write Brendan at Brendan@wydaily.com. You can also reach him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/#!/White__Knuckles.